U Gotta Be Kiddin Me

I got a phone call a few minutes ago that they removed the tube that was keeping her alive. Not much else, they asked if she had a living will or a DNR because she was transfered to this other hospital. They are not sure if she is going to make it the night. I am in total tears right now. I may have to get there as soon as possible. I need to say a few things to her. Before she leaves us. Its not easy. My heart is broken.

And I can’t get out.
I am losing patience in everything I do.
I am losing patience in people.
I hate slow drivers.
I hate it when the store runs out of ice.
My boyfriend just pisses me off.
I am tired of pleasing everyone else.
Just tired …..PERIOD.

It seems when you are not working people take advantage of you and think that its ok too. I am simply done. From now on. The word is going to be NO. NO. NO. Not doing any favors for anyone whatsoever. I simply cannot afford to do so. Especially when I do something for someone, expect to be paid on a agreement we had. And of course it never happens especially in a time that I needed it the most. I was supposed to go to Chicago to see a family member who is on life support. And it didn’t happen. I have bills just like the rest of use and anyone who has a house. My light bill had to be paid on Friday no matter what. I used my entire Child Support check which was half the bill amount. Which leaves me with no gas money whatsoever this week to get my Son back and forth to school.

SO until then. This is going to be my life. I am not putting up with no more shit from anyone. I am simply done. And that’s it. Now and forever.

My cellphone was acting all goofy. It kept turning off and on. It was irritating me. I may go online and search for some unlocked cell phones with the ones that take sim cards. I have too because of the carrier I am with its extremely picky.

I wish there was some flea markets around here. I am bored today and would love to go shopping at some flea markets. Well we are about to run to the store and get some groceries. We are OUT. Completely it seems we have a imaginery animal that eats our food. Then again when you have someone that works third shift. He comes home and eats whatever he can find to eat. What a piggy!!!!

At least today we are not rearranging everything around here. Last week when we were moving the computer stuff I stepped on the Cat5e patch cable and almost tripped myself. That’s some pretty scary hair raising stuff when you going down and see a sharp corner in your path.

Yesterday, I was supposed to head to Chicago but with the funds being low, I wasn’t able to go. I am sad because this is something I should of done. Now I am mad at myself. I will find out what is going on. I may call the hospital itself and find out. And let them know I am long distance away and family. I have a right to find out without having to spend all that time and money driving there. Well I have some stuff to get done and get dressed right now.